Movie Review: Abduction

Posted: September 27, 2011 in movie reviews, movies
Tags: , , , , ,

It only took this movie 3 minutes to get Taylor Lautner’s shirt off. And it didn’t even really get THAT right. I don’t know what I expected from this movie, just something more. Maybe, first off, a kid being abducted?

Abduction
Starring: Taylor Lautner, Lily Collins, Sigourney Weaver, Alfred Molina, Maria Bello

Premise:  Nathan (Taylor Lautner), while working on a school project, discovers a picture of himself as a child on a missing children website. 5 minutes later after clicking on his supposed name, two men with guns show up a his home sending him and his crush on a while fugitive like chase across Ohio. Who is Nathan? He’s not so sure anymore.

My Review: I don’t know why I wanted to see this movie. I really don’t. I’m just NOT a fan of Taylor Lautner at all. In my opinion he comes across as cocky and arrogant – like he knows he’s cool. This movie felt like a big ego boost for him to say “Look world I’m cool!”

People say Taylor could be the next Tom Cruise. And this movie is “supposedly” that stepping stone. Only problem is Tom Cruise is Tom Cruise for a reason. Because he has that charisma, that like-ability. He wasn’t TRYING to be cool he just is. Cruise went off the deep end and I still watched Mission Impossible 3. And I liked it. Lautner, however, is trying to be cool and this movie pushes this “cool factor” SO HARD. From the party, to the goofing off in class, to the leather jacket, to the motorcycle. Sorry Lautner, but Tom Cruise pulled off cool in his underwear.

Even with top-notch players such as Sigourney Weaver, Alfred Molina, Jason Isaacs and Maria Bello, this movie felt contrived. I felt like I was watching a kids’ movie, like Spy Kids 2 or Agent Cody Banks. I was watching a kid play hero when I wanted more substance from my leading “man”.

However, it’s not all Taylor’s fault. I know I’m being uber-harsh on this kid, who for all I know could be an awesome guy. This movie had a ton of other faults: Lily Collins had no personality, the action was kinda lame, the dialogue was cheesy (“I watched them die in front of me, with my own eyes!” how else would he have watched them die in front of him?) and an the plot was inconsistent/ hard to follow. I’m still not sure why those people were after him.

Overall, I should have stuck to my gut and saved this movie for red box, or HBO. Next time I’ll follow my gut. I’ll learn from my mistakes.

Rating: 1  1/2 star.

 

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Comments
  1. Russ Nickel says:

    This looked terrible, and 3% on rotten tomatoes? Sorry you were subjected to this haha. Should’ve stuck with Twilight I guess.

    http://thenickelscreen.com

  2. Hey Crazy Person, good review! My guess is the reason you wanted to see this movie is cos you just enjoy seeing new movies, and popcorn or whatever, and this was the best of the new releases on a weak week. And every now and then the movies we think aren’t going to be up to much, pleasantly surprise us, just not in this case!

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